Thursday, September 1, 2011

Forced Fun, the Good, the Bad, the Ugly

So, last Tuesday I decided to be a "fun" mom and do a little craft activity with my boys. My friend had suggested making Froot Loop necklaces, and I thought, yeah, my kids would love that. And besides what kid doesn't love a necklace you can eat.....apparently my boys.This was Logan's expression pretty much the whole time in between, I don't want to do this, I don't want to make a necklace. And me saying, yes you do, we're having fun, so be happy! Finally I was able to get the cereal on and get his necklace done and of course he ate it before I could get a picture of the finished product. He wouldn't wear it (fine by me actually that he doesn't want any jewelry, even if it's edible), but biting them off made a huge mess because he didn't realize that when he bit them, that the other part of the loop was falling all over the place.
Damon pretty much cried and fought the whole process and then was devastated when it was done and I gave it to him. He refused to bite them off and wouldn't wear it. He only wanted to eat it, but only if they were already off the string. So, I cut the string and pulled off Froot Loops for him to eat amidst the tears. We had a blast! (dripping with sarcasm if you didn't catch that) We also had a friend over, but by this time he was gone, at least one person had fun. :)

Note to self: so far crafts or "special" activities have not been a huge hit at our house...is that a boy thing or a mom thing? I'm not sure, but it will definitely be a long time before I try this particular activity again. It was not worth the whining, the tears, or the mess. And really I probably shouldn't have forced it upon them. The only solace was that at least I felt like I had tried and that's something, right?

Today however was a different story. The boys woke up super early...all of them...ugh. So, I decided to let them watch a movie this morning. We went to the library and got some new movies to take on our road trip and I let them watch one. Halfway through the movie, Logan wanted to lay down next to me, but then so did Damon, and Tragon...and they all started fighting, so I sat up and said, okay boys since we're fighting over that, how about we all just sit by each other.

Logan was not down with that idea. He threw the biggest tantrum I've seen from the kid in a while. He spent at least 45 minutes in the back bedroom after throwing around a whole bunch of toys and hitting, so after that 45 minutes I hear him slamming the blinds against the window and ripping the foam mattress we have back there (in case we need to split rooms at night, that's only happened once or twice I think, but it's as good of storage place as any...at least it used to be). I went back there and decided he just needed me to hold him. So I started the mommy hold we sat down and he started slapping me, so I folded his arms and held them. Then he started kicking me, so I crossed my legs over his. Then he started head butting me and had he not been sliding down I think I may have ended up with a broken collar bone, man that kid is tough.

Then came the biting. The first time, not so bad, there is definitely a nice circle bruise on my arm. He seemed to actually be calming down, so I let his arms and legs go and then the thrashing began anew, I held him again, and this time when he bit, he almost broke skin and will definitely leave a mark and I had a knee jerk reaction and smacked him in the forehead (not hard, just enough that his teeth let go of my arm, but I still felt the guilt as bad as the bite). After that I decided that I was doing more harm than good, so I left the room. And I wasn't sure how much more patience I had being smacked around without smacking back. I guess Logan just needs to duke it out with himself and I just have to remove anything he can get hurt with while he's in timeout. He sat in there for another good 45 minutes until lunch was ready when he finally made his way upstairs. It was NOT a good morning. I think we were all tired and hungry and in all fairness because of this, it was a lazy morning and we hadn't really done much to kill the extra energy. As I was getting lunch ready I realized that we didn't have a morning snack which is much needed when we eat breakfast so early.

Everyone except Logan took a nap after lunch, but he was so sweet and played nice and quiet so I could lay down for a few minutes. The rest of the afternoon was great. While Tragon was sleeping we went outside and built a sand castle and tried to do a moat, but the sand soaked up the water too fast, but they loved it we even "melted" our castle with the water after. Then we took turns singing and telling stories with their toy microphone. Later when Tragon woke up we came inside and built a tower with couch cushions and jumped off. Then they just played nice together for the next couple hours until dinner was ready. Really, it was awesome. I guess I just need to figure out what kind of activities my boys like to do. They just like to be more active. Froot Loop necklaces: no, sandcastles: yes, cushion towers: yes.

And tonight, they even cleaned up the whole basement without a fuss so we could read our new stories from the library. So, even though it started out as a bad day, I'm learning and still figuring things out, and we really ended on a good note. I hope that carries through until tomorrow.

I love my boys and they are a blast sometimes. Other times they try my patience and energy that it makes me wonder if I'm doing them any good. There are so many things that I wish I would or could have done different, but that's how we learn to make it better next time. Hopefully by writing these experiences down I can look back and learn more and remember more after I forgotten. And I'm sure that because I'm praying and asking for patience, the Lord will bless us with many opportunities to practice. :) Baby #4, you're going to be coming into a crazy home, I hope you're preparing yourself up there, it's a wild ride. Until next time...

1 comment:

heidijogoody said...

wow - wild ride I would say yes. I think sometimes as a mom you think really what is going on and what have I done wrong. I think it was best for you to leave the situation with Logan like you did because it didn't seem like he was settling down just getting work. As a mom our patience is always tried and tested. Thank goodness for tomorrow and for a fresh start on everything. You are a great mom!